Just some of the goings on around here.  I went into the twins room this morning and the curtain was off the window with the curtain rod on the floor.  At the same time Elijah and Emily say, "Obilee did it!" "Ijah did it!"  Lydia was in the family room watching "Little Prairie on the House" and says it's about Indians coming to Walnut Grove, but don't worry, they come in peace.  Then she asks me why everyone is naked in India?   Every time it comes on Emily says, "Mommy, I lika da music!"  and all three kids sing the theme song.  The other day Lydia was singing, "Home, home on the range, where the dear old Eskimos play ..."  Then the other day I was on the phone with my mom and Emily says, "Let me talk to your mom" as she reaches for the phone.  They are hilarious.  Every time I change a poopy diaper the twins tell me to say, "Heavens to Betsy!  Oh my heavens!  and Yucko Blucko"  Oh, Lydia has her first real loose tooth, and she thinks Aunt Chrissy is going to pull it out tonight at church.  We'll see... 

 

 

Then this one today

 

 

Then the answer to this conundrum

 

 

Our hope can only be in His unfailing love.  This is kind of the theme in the book, Searching for God Knows What by Donald Miller.  It talks about how at our core as humans we desire to be fully known, and still be loved.  We crave approval from the God that created us, but usually project that need onto other people or things.  We want this unfailing love, but no human is quite up to the task to be that for another.  I'm not discounting the love of a spouse, parent, sibling or friend, I'm just saying that when we have a need as deep as that of being human   it will only be met by the Lord.  Then everyone else's love is the "cup overflowing" as Beth Moore says.  I just thought it was cool when I looked at my Bible and those verses were opposite each other.

 

 

Well, I've been run over by a truck this weekend.  Friday morning I woke up barely able to talk and feeling like if I took a deep breath I would drown.  It was so bad that I actually went to the doctor!  Thankfully it is not the flu or strep, but that also means no antibiotics to make it go away faster.  I've run a low fever and been coughing up the creeping crud all weekend.  Elijah started getting very wimpy yesterday and coughing.  It's kind of twisted, but I love when any of my kids are sick and want to snuggle.  It's one of the only times they slow down enough to just sit in my lap and let me hold them.  It was so sweet the way he kept saying, "Ma-mom, I'm so sleepy."  I love the way he calls me "Ma-mom" instead of Mama.  Last night was very rough though.  I woke up about 4 am and coughed like I hadn't all weekend.  Every time I laid down I felt like I was chocking to death.  I got up and had cough syrup and a cup of tea.  I ended up being awake about an hour.  Aaron got up around 7:30 and gave the twins a bottle.  When we woke up again around 10, we found that Elijah had puked in his bed and fallen back asleep!  So we stripped him and his bed and took care of it.  I never thought I'd be exposed to so much vomit.  He seems to be better today.  So we've been laying around not doing much.  The list is mocking me.  I've gotten hardly anything done since the beginning of the year, but I'm looking toward spring when I can get some real cleaning in and hopefully get ready to sell our house.  We are wanting to start building in the next month or two.  I'm totally rambling, but wanted to make a connection with the outside world.  I also wanted to say that I really appreciate every one's comments on my last post.  It feels so good when you can express God's goodness.    

This past Sunday morning service I had my mind flooded with an experience that happened about seven years ago.  First of all, I thought it was so cool how Bro. Steve was encouraging us to choose to be thankful for things when we are down.  I've started a gratitude journal this year, it's something I've never done.  Each morning I try to think of one thing and write down five things that I'm grateful for on that idea.  I've done the obvious - Aaron, Lydia, Elijah and Emily.  But I've also picked things that trouble me or annoy me, and try to "turn that frown upside down"  and it really works!  Anyway, when Neal started singing "God Won't Give Up" I thought, what a truth to be thankful for!  I can always be thankful and trust that the Lord will never leave me or forsake me.  So while I was meditating on this, I had this memory.

 

I was working at my last job at a software company before coming home.  I really liked my job, but the owners were very difficult to work with.  It was founded by a genius of a guy in his late 20s, who then sold the company for $60 million to a holding company when he was about 30 years old.  He stayed on with the company as CEO.  He was very intelligent, but had no people skills and almost no morals.  He had made a friend of his the President of the company who got joy out of belittling people and using as many cuss words as he could in each sentence.   And that guy had a "wife" that was the Blah Blah Blah Coordinator of Who Knows What.  Which meant she was on payroll and could spend anything she wanted for her beautiful office, and order cases of alcohol for their "meetings".  So I had to interact with them on several financial issues.  These people were so arrogant and self absorbed.  The CEO had a habit of asking people, "do you KNOW who I am?" if they questioned anything he did.  I felt so disgusted when I would have to deal with them, and I remember sitting in church every Friday night on the verge of tears because of how bad it had been all week.  Why was I there at all?  Well the company was divided between the developers of the software and the business side.  When I started, I wasn't even in the same building as these people.  My boss was great and I was learning so much, and I just loved it.  But then it took this turn.  Well, one Saturday I was driving to Walmart in Kentucky to do grocery shopping.  I was crying and asking the Lord, "why do I have to be here?  Why do I have to be in this situation?  What lesson are you trying to teach me that I'm not getting yet?"  Right as I was crying out those questions, my car was filled with the CD I was listening to - "Love lifted me, Love lifted me, When nothing else could help, Love lifted me."  I felt like the volume was turned up, and oh I felt so calm in that moment.  I felt the Lord telling me that He wanted to show me what He had lifted me out of.  My bent has never been partying, drugs, crazy lifestyle, etc.  But I know that I could have gone the path of greed, corporate success, power, etc.  The people that I could have seen as "having it all" I got an up close and personal view of their miserable lives.  It was confirmed to me the next day at church.  Someone was testifying to seeing a homeless prostitute in Nashville and being moved to compassion for her state, and thankfulness for all the Lord had lifted them out of.  And the band played "Love Lifted Me" for the band song!  You would think I would have testified, but I guess I am now.  It was obvious that both ends of the social spectrum were in need of the Lord.  It was about three or four weeks after this experience that I was able to quit this job.  I'm so thankful for the love the Lord has shown me, enough love to keep me from myself!

After adding strings of numbers and casting out nines, I'm not sure I have much left.  Yeah right.

 

1.  I have to listen to "white noise" to go to sleep.  I cannot sleep without it, and I've trained my babies to do the same.

 

2.  I count as I climb and descend stairs (with the exception of the 3 times I fell and broke a bone).  This is especially necessary at Maggiano's when you have to use the gigantic set of stairs to use the bathroom.  It just calms me to count, and you know stairs bring me anxiety.

 

3.  I learned from my Grandma Megaw that you never pass a bathroom without making sure you don't need to "go".

 

4.  I keep my grocery list in Excel.  I print it out and highlight the things I need that trip.  I'm always tempted to show it to everyone at the store so they can see what a good idea it is. 

 

5.  A mission that surfaces from time to time is to prove to Aaron that we do not live in the "house of neglect".  One time while pregnant with the twins our air conditioner went out around midnight.  He got upset because I could not find the owner's manual that the previous owners had left us (about 5 years prior) and said it was because we live in the house of neglect.  Excuse me, I have a file on each one of my children and I run the house of neglect?  So I am militant about knowing where everything is.

 

6.  I keep EVERY receipt for EVERY thing we spend.  Aaron asked me why I was keeping grocery and dry cleaning receipts from 2005, and I couldn't really answer him, but you never know ....